Our Favorite 20 Ways to Be a Little More FrenchMarch 31st, 2017
1. Drink your coffee sitting down, and out of an actual cup.
2. Insist that you have ‘almost no money left’ when your friends invite you to a cocktail bar. Propose wine at yours.
3. Always carry a packet of tissues in your bag.
4. Moisturize obsessively.
5. Spend a sixth of your income on scented candles.
6. Order rosé in March like the brazen, untameable woman that you are.
7. Make the last item on your grocery list a gigantic bouquet of flowers.
8. Be suspicious of: politicians, dating apps, supermarket bread, overly-smiley people, any orange cheese that isn’t mimolette, and cafés that serve more than two kinds of milk. Also: margarine.
9. Always assume people want your opinion.
10. Ensure that at least 85% of what you say is accompanied by hand gestures.
11. Shoot an emphatic look of horror at any person who asks to meet for dinner before 8pm.
12. Have a favorite chef.
13. And a favorite film director.
14. Learn how to ride a bike in a dress without flashing anyone.
15. Spend a few hours every weekend wandering through a new neighborhood without any specific purpose in mind.
16. Go to a museum to look at “art”, by which we mean “handsome men with sensitive souls and a great collection of Merino wool sweaters that they regularly dry clean because they have both the sense and income to do so.”
17. Wear a plain white t-shirt and jeans with an absurdly expensive perfume.
18. Compliment other women and mean it.
19. In summer, carry a small bottle of facial mist with you and spritz yourself in public with wild, sensual abandon.
20. Wear matching sets.
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